Book Review - Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins

There is a lot to comprehend in this book. It is not my normal "self help" style book. However there are many different angles and perspectives that you can take on the general message. If I can quickly summarize the lesson, quit being a b-------.

 

David Goggins had a rough child hood. He grow up in an abusive household with a dad that would beat him, his brothers, and mom. He grew up in an era in Indiana that was known for racism. The book discusses his dark history and the struggle he had.

 

I will be honest, I felt spoiled. I have had an easier life than many. I grew up in a loving family. My dad loves my Mom and would never lay a hand on her. Though I took my share of spankings as a kid. I feel I was never beaten or abused. My spankings were minimal. I was not a perfect kid, but I was a decent kid. Good grades, good friends, and I went to school where I was honestly one of the poorer kids. Kids of all races and backgrounds were well off in our area of Newnan, GA. Some people had it better than others, but there was nothing lack in our education system. We did not have mass racism where I grew up. It was a school where the black kid drove a BMW, and was a cool kid, just like any other, and I was there in my 1992 Chevrolet Corsica.

 

To grow up in a world where I did not see lots of racism made this back story difficult to me. I do live blindly as to what happens around me. I am not a social justice warrior. I do no longer get involved with politics and steer clear of social justice questions. I want people to live free as they are, period. I do not want anything more, nothing less, and where I grew up, that opportunity was there.

 

To hear David's experience growing up in his small town his horrifying. Being called Racial slurs constantly and falling behind in every way. He spent most of his life faking his reality. Pretending to be thug to live up to the stereotype of black people by racist whites, faking it in school to barely get by, and pretending not to care about his state of mind. Meanwhile his reality was crashing around him.

 

The book gives his life stories from working in a skate rink as a child, being abused by his father, to learning how to fake it in school, and when he finally saw his first challenge in life,  how he achieved his first goal he set out for that he put his mind on and all of the failures along the way. There were MANY, and I emphasize many errors and shortcomings along the way. He provides a detailed look at his failures and how he over came them.

 

He had to study harder than ever, work out harder than ever, and focus beyond measure as he went from Navy drop out turned EcoLab pest manager to becoming a Navy Seal. Once he achieved that dream, which took many months of focus, including dropping 100 lbs, and becoming a more studious person, something he already struggled with. He went on to achieve many things in his career and is constantly pursuing new goals to push him to find himself.

 

Through the book he gives many life lessons and tricks. I wanted to share my favorites:

 

1.) Accepting failure. Failure is natural. Dan Pena once said " Success is like being Pregnant. Everyone says congratulations but no knows how many times you got F%C&D." Success does not fall into your lap. It is earned. With each mistake he made there was something he had to learn and adjust for later in his success. Each failure was a stepping stone. When he failed to reach the pull up world record, he attempted it again, and failed, and then one more time, before he achieved this milestone. He accepted the loss, he learned he needed a better pull up bar, a different set up, a different scenery, to be able to move forward. It allowed him to accept the suffering of what it would take.

 

2.) Live in the suffering! Suffering is a part of success. Live in it, relish in it. During his multiple attempts at becoming a Navy Seal he developed the mentality of acceptance when it comes to the pain and mental strain. It was part of the success. He ran miles on broken leg in Navy Seal and to be hospitalized twice during his pull up world record attempts. He put in hurt. When he wanted to becoming a  Seal he ran daily, swam daily, and studied daily, and for hours. He was able to relish in the pain and enjoy the struggle.  We want to live a comfortable easy life. I want the weight to naturally fall off of my body. It would be great! I know for me to live up to my potential I am going to have to thrive in the pain. I HATE running. I loathe it, I hate seeing people who enjoy running. The only thing I have run to in the last 10 years is to the front door of a Krispy Kreme for a Hot and Ready dozen donuts. Suck it up, quick being a lazy sack of crap, and enjoy the pain.

 

3.) Be honest with your self. You need to be honest. If you are reading this book or listening to this podcast there could very easily be something that you are working on in your life. Maybe it is bettering your education, maybe being a better partner, or to better your mental or physical health. You need to be honest with yourself and stop sugar coating your problems. When we are soft on reality we give ourself an "ok" down the road to fall back into old habits. I had to look in the mirror and say "Jonathan, you are a lazy sack of potatoes, you have done with your physical and mental state. You are where you are because YOU have made bad decisions. It is not society, it is not my work, it is not anyone else, it is my job to take care of me, and I need to stop being a piece of garbage and fix MY problems NOW!" That is tough for many people to accept and do. Do not give yourself the excuses later.

 

4.) Accountability is your most useful tool. David knew he was facing a problem. He looked himself in the mirror at the end of his Junior year in high school. He saw the disgrace. He could barely read on a 3rd grade level, he had been kicked off the basketball team for his bad attitude, he failed his ASVAB testing to meet minimum standards for military. He recognized his failure and demanded accountability. He made an accountability mirror. He wrote on sticky notes what he wanted to achieve and goals to get there.  Every day when you look in the mirror you have to ask yourself, are you achieving those notes. Only you can answer to that every day.  Every day when you brush your teeth you have to make a demand of yourself each day of what is on your accountability mirror.  Be specific on your mirror with your sticky notes. Give yourself some sticky notes of small goals that will lead to the larger goal, but do not make it easy on yourself. Stare down your goals each day.

 

If you are looking to make a change in your life Can't Hurt Me is an amazing book to read or to listen to on audible. On the audible version you get a lot of bonus material that you miss out on in the book. It is a book reading/podcast that has open dialogue between David Goggins and the narrator. It helps develop a deeper understanding of David Goggins life.

 

If you are offended by offensive language, this might not be your book. Goggins does not sissy foot the point, he does not miss the point. He is straight forward and in your face about solutions to your problem. You are going to hear the N-word read over your ear buds as you listen to the book. Though I was initially  put back by his choice of words, I appreciated his passion and honesty of who he was. He is a Navy Seal, and he uses every language of the Seals, and that included 4 and 5 letter words. I recommend this book to everyone. I really do, but you need to be prepared for some potty mouth. I assure you, you will come out better on the end for having listen to his story.

 

I challenge you to set up your accountability mirror. Make changes. I will be sharing my mirror with you on instagram. Please check out our page and you can see my goals. This is not a "I am better" it is a "we are better together" mentality. Tag us and show us your mirror! Looking forward to seeing. your goals and your happiness when you achieve your dreams.